Thursday, September 25, 2008

Give Me Back My Phone!

Part II of previous entry:

While in the shuttle, walking to our seats at the Bowl, and thereafter, I would periodically fish around my handbag, then the shoulder bag it was sitting in, grasping for any object that remotely felt like my cell phone. I was sure I had brought my phone with me.

Upon returning home, I poured all contents of both bags onto my bedroom floor... No Phone! How could this be??? Wait a minute. Retrieving seating arrangements from mental compartment: Johnathan, me, my bags, strange man stuffing face with greasy popcorn and guzzling beer. Hmmm. He left his seat mid performance and NEVER CAME BACK! Dun Dun Dun! Could it be that I was robbed?! My heart began to pound as I thought of all the potential lost phone numbers and the inconvenience of procuring a new phone!

I'm just sure I had it in my purse! (You know how the mind begins to fog in moments of anxiety?) Maybe I was completely off. Maybe my phone was somewhere in the house. I ran to the kitchen phone, dialed my number, and then proceeded to listen VERY carefully for the whispered buzz it would emit upon connection. Nothing! But the phone was ringing. My voice mail clicked on, but where was my pre-recorded message?? Simultaneously, the caller ID flashed my phone number. How strange! *BEEP* I began leaving a message for the perpetrator holding my phone captive! (My voice was a raspy desperate whisper):

"Hello. You have my phone. Give me back my phone. I need my phone. Give it back! Good Byyyyyyyyyyyyyye...."

I hung up. The number was still flashing on the caller ID. I read it one last time...562...805...wait a minute! That's not my number! I'd switched two of the numbers around!

Some poor unsuspecting person woke up that morning, saw they missed a call at 1:50 a.m., then listened as some creepy whispering weirdo was going on about their phone; a non-stolen stolen phone!!!

Sunday, September 21, 2008

A Chair of Bowlies

It was a Saturday August 30th, 2008. I had walked for Prop 8 in the morning with Miss Cassidy. We had a few truly unexpected encounters. The first two doors we knocked on were answered by felons...why were they on our list of registered voters? Then there was the ribbiting motion detector frog. Cat asked the couple, "If the frog were to vote today..." Cat came with me to Costco- we had lunch, bought and loaded 7 watermelons into my car, then I drove to church where I met Johnathan.

I mentioned to him a group was going to the Hollywood Bowl that night. John Williams was to conduct the L.A. Phil while they played various film scores he has composed spanning half a century. J said lets go!

We found free parking by the Kodak Theater and proceeded to scout out a foodish venue. While in the midst of a crowd waiting to cross the street, my and Johnathan's gaze were pulled in opposite directions as we stepped off the curb. There to my left, was a greasy middle aged man, cradling a digital camera, which he was aiming straight at the women's butts in front of him! As he began snapping away, I uttered, "Sicko!" But he continued on. Johnathan on the other hand was busy being baffled by a second man clad in cowboy boots and black underwear. (I thought that was strictly a Times Square phenomenon...) When we hit the opposite curb we both turned to each other and exclaimed, "Did you see that?!"

This was Johnathan's first concert of any kind. What a beauty it was. Projected on gigantic flat screens were various film clips and medleys which coincided with the live music. My favorite part was the army of light sabers sprouting up as the opening strains of the Star Wars theme song began. Stems of red, green, and blue bounced to the beat of the symphonic swells. It put a HUGE smile on my face.

After the show we opted to walk back to the car, bypassing the hour long shuttle line and rows of cars piled bumper to bumper for miles.

This brings me to one of L.A.'s little treasures. The only street food L.A. can really claim it's own: the famed "heart-attack dogs". Passing by a string of carritos, the smell of bacon coiled hot dogs, onions, peppers, and poblano chilies crackling and spitting on an open grill captured our full attention. (Swirl a bit of mayonnaise on top and your mouth will be caught up in the rapture.)

We had parked behind Crossroads of the World, hailed as America's first modern shopping mall. Located on Sunset Boulevard and Las Palmas, the mall features a central building designed to resemble an ocean liner surrounded by a small village of cottage-style bungalows, complete with a working lighthouse! Once a busy outdoor shopping center, the Crossroads now hosts private offices. It has been used for location shooting in many films such as L.A. Confidential.

It was here that J and I tried to cut through the parking lot to Sunset. Bad move! Two monstrous thugs quickly came into view. They began yelling and ascending upon us as we drove past them. We didn't dare slow down for fear that they might thrash us with heavy chains. Our bypassing them only led us to a fenced off parking lot- Oh No! What now?! J said, "I'm gonna turn around and mow them over if I have to!" Thankfully we were able to maneuver past them. It felt like we tore out of that lot at 65 mph!

The last incident of the night had to do with my phone, but I'll save that for the next entry. :)